I'll let you know . . . if you suck

My daughter goes through phases where she asks a lot of questions about her adoption. Then we usually have a lull where she's more concerned with things like watching yodeling videos on YouTube (I am not making that up).

Last week she dug out some of her adoption books (The Red Thread, Tell Me Again About the Night I Was Born, etc.) and read them, so I figured a question was coming.

"Mom, were you friends with J [her birthmom] before you adopted me?  Did you know her before that?"

"No," I said. "We met her through the adoption agency."

She nodded.  "Oh, okay."  Silence for a few moments.  "And she picked you and Daddy because she thought you would be good parents for me?"

"Yes, I think so," I responded.  "I assume she chose us because she thought we'd be good parents.  Was she right?"

My daughter started to walk out of the room and then turned to look back at me over her shoulder.  "I'll let you know," she said. And then kept walking.  So sassy!

This summer we are planning a visit with her birthmom (she lives several states away but will be in town for her sister's wedding).  It will be the first in-person visit in around seven years. I haven't told the kid yet but I will, soon. I am looking forward to the visit.

In the meantime, I'll just carry on with my mediocre parenting. Cuz that's how I roll.

Comments

Lisa.Y. said…
Alex has just started asking some serious questions and I've been looking for some decent books. Thanks for the recommendations :)
March 5, 2013 at 7:19 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It's been a minute, but let's talk about my b*o*o*b*s

Image
I'm in the sixth grade. I'm sitting on the floor at my friend Sharon's house. Rachel is there, too. My well-meaning friends turn to me and gently let me know that I "really don't need to bother wearing a bra." They aren't wrong. I'm wearing one, but the situation doesn't particularly warrant it.  Two years later, I found myself sporting a C cup. My mom, a talented seamstress, made me a dress at about that time. It was a slim-fitting column dress with a matching jacket, as I recall. The white fabric had large polka dots; we jokingly called it the Wonder Bread dress. My mom took my measurements. 36-24-36 At some point in history, those numbers were considered "perfect measurements" for a woman. This was 1984; I'd like to think the world as a whole is less concerned about such things these days. I'm confident my daughter has no earthly idea what her measurements are. She just knows she's cute.  Growing up with a fun array of medi...
Read more

On Being Patriotic

The list of adjectives I assign to myself is pretty long: clumsy, organized, competent, uptight, etc. One that might surprise you: patriotic. I fully understand what it means to be an American and am darned happy about living here. But, I have a beef (that part won't surprise you). I've grown tired of certain segments of the population thinking that they've cornered the market on patriotism or that they can dictate precisely how the rest of us express ourselves when it comes to our shared country and flag. Sometimes it seems like the Toby-Keith-boot-in-yer-ass brand of patriotism drowns out the rest of us. For the record, I don't believe that patriotism requires a love of NASCAR, a disdain for immigrants, a Republican voting record, or a preference for country music. Nor does it require adherence to a specific religion. I've seen Facebook posts from some of my friends and acquaintances that call for all of us to return to the "Christian principles on which ...
Read more

14 Weeks

Image
My baby is leaving me in 14 weeks.  She and I started touring colleges in May of 2022. When I applied to colleges back in 1988, I was an English major so there were no auditions. Colleges basically just said, "Sounds good. Come on in." I was the first person in my immediate family to go to college and as a whole, I don't think we understood the importance of campus visits and such. I ended up being fairly miserable that first year until I transferred to a school closer to home. For my daughter, I wanted to make sure she had an opportunity to see lots of college campuses so that she had the best shot at figuring out what she wants out of the college experience. I wanted her to look at elements like campus size and location, diversity, activities, distance from home, and distance from the nearest "big city" (since performers often head to larger cities with active theatre scenes after college).  Last summer, we began the daunting process known as "getting int...
Read more