Party Pooper

Every party needs a pooper, that's why we invited you, party pooper, party pooper!

Actually, I'm the party pooper. I've decided not to throw a party for my kid on her birthday this year. Is that terrible? Will my child be in therapy someday? I picture her sitting in some therapist's office and saying, "It allllll started with my third birthday . . . " (and then she'll go on to talk about the innumerable ways in which I've ruined her life)

A's birthday is coming up on May 3rd. I suspect that the actual day will be somewhat anti-climactic for her, in as much as she believes that every day is her birthday. "It's my birthday!" she says, and then waits for some sort of fanfare. So, the other day I hoisted her up on my hip, and showed her the calendar on the refrigerator. I flipped to May and pointed to the 3rd. "THAT is your birthday. May 3rd. Learn it, live it, know it."

Then I told her that instead of having a party this year, we are going to take a trip. We are going to take her out of town for the weekend (as luck would have it, the big day falls on a Saturday this year). We will spend the day at a children's museum and any other kid-centric activities we can find. She can have ice cream for lunch if she wants. Then we'll take her out to dinner. And we'll stay at a hotel where she can go swimming.

When I told her of my plans, she didn't seem upset at all about the lack of a traditional birthday party. All she said was:

"Can I have cake?"
"Sure, of course we'll get you a cake."
"A NEW cake?" Shoot, I guess that the used cake I got her last year didn't go over so well.
"Yes, a new cake."
"A pink cake?"
"You want the cake to be NEW and PINK? Now yer talkin' crazy."

So anyway, I hope this doesn't make me a bad mother. The first year, we had a party at our home. It was a lot of work but that first birthday is such a milestone that I don't think there is any way around the whole party machine. Last year we had a party at The Little Gym. I didn't have to clean my house so I can't really complain. This year I just don't feel like doing a party at all. Don't get me wrong - I don't mind parties. We've been to lots of kids' birthday parties. I just feel like it could easily get out of hand each year. Next thing I know I'll have a pony milling about in my backyard while a juggler entertains the kids out front.

Okay, I just ran the spell check tool, and spell check does not like the word "pooper." Talk about a party pooper.


Marginwalker said…
My parents never threw me a birthday party, and I turned out fine! :) Right?
Glad I'm not the only one--we just moved and don't know anyone, but do have a few family members nearby so it will be fun anyway.

We had a bash for Gigi's first, then last year I had an infant as well and I canceled her party due to various others reasons (colic, tantrums--theirs and mine, feeling pressured to compete with the Spectacular, Over the Top, Toddler Birthday Bashes, and so on). We just had hubby's aunt and uncle over, decorated pumpkin bread (store bought!), blew out candles, and the greats proceeded to chase Gigi around the living room. We all had a ball. This year she gets to go to Disney World again (we now live an hour and 15 away) and be dressed up like the Princess of her choosing. That will make her century. We'll probably go out to dinner somewhere where people come out and sing to her with big fanfare. If she's concerned about it next year (when she's differently aware of her friendships with other little kids), then maybe we'll throw a party. I still like the idea I read someplace (don't remember where)--every few years they threw a party with friends but the rest were simple family affairs.
Sam said…
Well, at least there will be a NEW cake!!

Personally, I think a trip sounds like a wonderful idea. Parties are so overstimulating for them. My kids loved their last birthday party (3-years old), but they both had complete breakdowns as soon as it was over. It's a lot for them. I think the special family trip you have planned will be a huge hit!
Mary said…
Because I know you want my opinion I think it's a great idea!! Spending your daughters birthday just with her and doing something that you don't do every day with her will mean a lot to her. Sounds like fun for mom and dad too!!;) I don't think there is really any wrong way.... some people can't afford to do much of anything for their kids birthday, I think it's just how we let them know they are loved especially on their birthday.
I think I know how much the kid is loved so I don't see a problem here.;)
Audreee said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jen said…
You are so not weird at all. We didn't throw a "2" birthday for Arthur and I don't really want to throw anything this year either. He's starting to get invited to parties at pre-school and I'm not liking the peer pressure...ha ha ha!

I think we may end up doing something small however, but it will be combined with a party for Robin turning one and only because we threw a party for Arthur when he turned one. I'm thinking small and simple....

But I'd really rather just have cake for us at home, you know?

Going to a hotel with a pool sounds like a novel idea...maybe we'll steal it!

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