The party of the year has come and gone. I hereby proclaim that the event was a success.

I took Friday off to prepare for the birthday bash. We've had a lot of crappy weather lately, but Friday was picture perfect.  I got up, made the first batch of cupcakes, and then went to yoga class.  After making a second batch of cupcakes, I took myself to lunch.  I was pretending to be a "lady of leisure" for the day. My friend Stephanie helpfully pointed out that I'm no lady. When it comes to friends, I am just . . . blessed.

As I was baking the cupcakes, I lined them up so that I could keep track of how many I'd made. I kept a close eye on them all day, but eventually had to leave them unattended so that I could blow-dry my hair. Moments later, I was missing one vanilla cupcake and one chocolate one (both unfrosted). There are three Boxers in my home and all looked equally guilty but unapologetic.  Those mofos ate the paper and everything. Chocolate is bad for dogs, so I hope the guilty party was at least rewarded with a wicked bout of diarrhea or something.

As for the cupcakes, I baked plenty and I think they turned out pretty well.  A couple of friends had given me some tips on piping the frosting.  Once the cupcakes were done (and stored where the dogs could not get to them), I assembled the goodie bags and packed about eight million other things for the party. By the time Saturday rolled around, I was feeling a little punchy because at that point my other half's singular contribution to the party preparation was to ask why I'd invited so many kids.  Well, because our child is five and has been talking about her party non-stop at school, that's why. When she's older (and the filter that should exist between her brain and her mouth finally comes in off backorder), then we'll just invite her friends.

We ended up with a total of 23 kids at the party.  Quite a few never RSVPed, so I was worried a few of those would show up. Only one kid from that category came (and did not bring a gift - I mean, not that it matters but that is tacky, right? Can I get an amen?) I gave parents the choice of staying or leaving, and they left in droves (I can't blame them - I do the same thing when I take A to a birthday party). The adults who stayed were primarily relatives and family friends. The room we rented at the library worked out great. There was room for the kids to run around a little. One thing I didn't anticipate: boys are insane. I brought along a gator golf game to help keep the kids occupied.  Well, you can tell I am used to having a daughter because never in a million years did I predict that the boys would pick up the plastic golf clubs and beat each other with them.

My friend Cindy brought her reptilian entourage so we did that part first.  She says she is not good with kids but honestly, I beg to differ. She told the kids to sit in their seats and they did. Before bringing out any of the animals, she laid out the ground rules for the kids. The rules essentially consisted of, "Once you touch an animal, there will be no booger picking or finger sucking. Basically, don't touch any of the holes in your head. Or your neighbor's head."  Cindy then brought out some of the snakes and let the partygoers handle several of them. The birthday girl got to spend some quality time with her favorite ball python, Jesse. A tortoise named Matilda meandered around the room during the party. After the kids got to see all of the animals and touch most of them, they then did a craft - a "snake" made out of a paper chain.

After some more running around, we doled out the cupcakes and the kids sang "happy birthday" to my daughter. My other half did make himself useful at the party, directing kids to the restroom, handing out Chex mix, etc.  Finally, we had the gift opening. Another difference between boys and girls: the boys don't give a rip about presents. The girls created a little swarm around my daughter, very anxious for the gifts they brought to be opened, and just very excited in general. The boys ran around the room, smacking each other with balloons and golf clubs. I'm pretty sure most of them had no earthly idea what was in the gift bags their moms made them bring.

Finally, the festivities were over. No one was bleeding and the tortoise had not managed to escape the library, so we chalked it all up to success.  I took Cindy out to dinner to thank her for all the hard work.  Now, 24 hours later, P and I are still liberating toys from packages (really, it's necessary to staple Barbie's hair to the cardboard backing?).  Me so tired. The things we do, I tell you.


You didn't have one of these at your kid's party, did ya?
Lieutenant Dan has a broken back and uses a lego wheelchair to get around.


Cindy the rockin friend said…
I think my rules made it perfect for you.

Im good with kids, I just tend to really not like them. A rules because she is smart enough to have a conversation with and snarky enough to understand sarcasm. I have like 5 kids I actually like.

Now this batch wasnt bad at all, but I have honestly come home with hives. :)
Lisa said…
looks like fun!!!
Steph K said…
Benji and both laughed at the part where you said you would never have guessed that boys would hit each other with the golf clubs! So very typical. :)

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