Aaaaaand bake by the light of the bulb

Just as young girls have done for the past several decades, my daughter has asked for an Easy Bake Oven for Christmas. P and I talked it over. We decided that if I could get one on sale on Black Friday, we'd go for it. I mean, Santa would go for it. I never owned an Easy Bake Oven as far as I can recall and so, before purchasing the oven, I posted the following on Facebook:

Two-pronged question for my friends who are parents. My daughter (5 1/2) wants an Easy Bake Oven for Christmas. 1. Is she too young? 2. Will I be able to stand eating that shit?

Well, let me tell you - people have some very strong feelings about the Easy Bake Oven. I got a ton of responses. Most said that the kid is definitely not too young. So, that question was answered easily. However, I received lots of editorial comments about the oven and the “baked” goods that come out of it. A random sampling:

• Who doesn’t like cake?
• I think you’ll live
• Oh, yeah!!! Cooking over a light bulb....pretty gourmet if you ask me!!
• 5 is a good age. My daughters were 3 and 5 when they got theirs. After showing her how to put the pan in and take it out, she was able to do it just fine on her own. The EBO packets are gross and ridiculously expensive. We buy the Jiffy cake mixes and just dump out the extra batter. They are about $.50 compared to the EBO mixes at $3-$4. You can also find directions online to make your own mixes, but I just go with the Jiffy.

From my reptile rescue friend: Claudia, I don't have kids, but seriously could an easy bake oven be any more dangerous than your daughter running around with one of my snakes? ;)

My personal favorite came from a church friend of mine: As for eating that shit, don't worry about it because you won't live long enough for the little light bulb inside that thing to actually bake a cake to completion! But seriously, the little cakes weren't bad. Becky said she loves 'em.

Also, one of my cousins in Texas read my post and then called to tell me how her kid had nearly burned down the house with her Easy Bake Oven.

I looked up the toy on amazon.com. Well, the reviews were pretty much abysmal. No love for the oven, ya'll. The thing that seemed to piss parents off the most is that the bulb does not come with the oven. And yes, the mixes are ridiculously expensive. Most seem to clock in at around $6-$7 each. My initial game plan is to con some of A's aunts into buying her some mixes for Christmas. After that, I think I will experiment with the Jiffy mixes as one of my friends suggested.  I mean, seriously, I could buy half a dozen gourmet brownies at a local bakery for the same price as one Easy Bake Oven mix.

As luck would have it, Target did have the Easy Bake Oven featured as a “door buster” on Black Friday. I got it for $16.99. Even better, when Santa asked the kid what she wanted the other day, she said, “An Easy Bake Oven.” (and didn't mention anything else) Now, her Christmas list was pretty extensive and we mostly ignored it because it was impossible to focus on specific items when there were so bloody many. She asked for everything for which a commercial has ever been made, and everything that was listed in the toy guides from Target and Toys R Us (including baby toys as well as items marketed solely and specifically to boys). Seeing as how she asked Santa for it, however, we’re hoping she’ll be thrilled to receive it. She'd better.  I had to smuggle that bugger all the way back from Oklahoma and pray she wouldn't realize it was stowed directly under her feet in the van.

Anyway, all's well that ends well. On Christmas Day, I expect to be gnawing on a room-temperature cake with gluey icing by noon at the very latest.