Sunday, March 11, 2012

Proud Parenting Moment #847

"She used her Play-Doh to make a what?"
School was closed on Friday, though I'm not exactly sure why (I've given up on understanding the method to the madness that is our school district's open/close schedule). My daughter spent the day at Kindercare.  When I picked her up, a staff member approached me. She smiled and said, "I just wanted to mention something to you . . . "  Uh oh.

She explained to me that the kids had been playing with Play-Doh earlier in the day. Apparently my daughter announced, loudly and repeatedly, that she was shaping her hunk of Play-Doh into . . . "a wiener."  I immediately began silently repeating in my head: maybe she was talking about a dog. A friend of hers has a miniature dachshund, so maybe?

"I'll talk to her," I told the staff member. She went on to tell me that she had tried ignoring A's loud proclamations about the phallus she was making, as she didn't want to give her the attention she was clearly seeking.

I nodded. "That was probably wise," I said.

"Yeah, and then when I tried to steer the class towards another activity, your daughter shouted, 'WAIT! I'm not done making my wiener!'" 

Moments later, I was loading my daughter into the van and clicking her seat belt for her.  "So, you used your play-doh to make a wiener? What is a wiener?"  please please please let her say something about a dog please please please

She pointed at her crotch. Great.  "Listen, I know you were trying to be funny, but making penises is not appropriate, okay? I'm not mad at you and you're not in trouble, but please don't do that again."  She frowned a bit and nodded. When we got home, I pulled her father aside so that I could share this proud achievement with him. "Your daughter used Play-Doh to make a wiener today." He (and maybe this has something to do with him being a boy) found it amusing.

I feel compelled to mention that we have no recollection of using the word "wiener" at any time. I'm not saying it's never been uttered in our home, but it's not like we replace every other noun with a synonym for penis. So, she must have picked it up at school .  . . a realization that's sobering in its own right.

If she starts molding testicles, I'm home-schooling her.

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