Sunday, May 31, 2009

Breakin' the law, breakin' the law (with apologies to Judas Priest)

I did the unthinkable yesterday. In fact, I'm not even sure it's legal. I bought white pants. More specifically, white denim capris (what? they were on sale!). After I got them home, I realized they were perhaps a bit too reminiscent of "Dirty Dancing" for comfort.

I've been avoiding white pants my entire life, mostly because of a girl named Honelore. I remember her last name, too, but I'll keep it to myself. And yes, that was her real first name, though I might be off on the spelling. In junior high, Honelore got her period one day. While wearing white pants. And apparently, she failed to notice for quite a while. The whole school knew about it before lunchtime and her name went down in infamy. I tucked that little lesson away in my brain. White pants = bad.

The other problem with white pants is, of course, the fact that they are not slimming. At all. So why did I purposely buy an optical ass enlarger? That, my friends, is the question.

6 comments:

Mary said...

LOL!! I mainly stray from white because I'm such a slob!!;) I can't keep a white shirt white and am pretty sure I would sit in some tar if I had white pants. Otherwise no... honestly it's not a sin, you will look great in them!!

Marianne said...

I have one pair of white capris- maternity ones. Not my smartest purchase ever but at least I know I won't get my period while wearing them!!!!!

Steph K said...

You will rock the white capris! The question is, will you make it out of the house with them still being white? Between A and the dogs, you have your work cut out for you. :)

Rachel said...

I remember that day in junior high and I think you got the spelling right. Remember when we had a recess inside, 6th grade, and Tina's wrap-a-round skirt fell off? You won't find one of those in my closet either.

Must be something in the air cause I brought a pair recently too. I've lost a lot of weight and thought I might venture into the forbidden zone. Just trying to step outside my comfort zone.

Lisa said...

optical ass enlarger??????!!!!
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Audreee said...

It's okay. Your ass is small enough these days that you can afford for it to be enlarged a bit :-)