Popcorn for Breakfast, and Other Toddler Fantasies

The potty training process seems to have ground to a halt. Last night the kid was standing on one of her plastic chairs and for reasons known only to her . . . peed on it. She alerted her dad and he alerted me so that I could, in his words, "sterilize the chair." A seemed unconcerned about the whole thing. We were saying things like, "Don't do that, it's kinda gross." And she would just repeat, "It's kinda gross."

She spent the rest of the evening trying to shut herself in the bathroom. We don't know what she wants to do in there by herself, but we know we don't want her doing it. (It probably involves flushing un-flushable stuff down the toilet.) She was in rare form all evening. She really seemed to be bucking for a time-out - it was just a matter of which offense would finally put me and/or her father over the edge.

The next problem we ran into last night was that she wouldn't go to sleep. She has been in her "big girl bed" for about a week now. This is the first time she's really had control over something, when you think about it. She is *in* bed but she doesn't HAVE to go to sleep. She has access to all of her stuff. Basically she is drunk with power. When I went to sleep (two hours after I put her in bed) I could still her her talking and flipping pages in her books.

Needless to say, her ass was dragging this morning. She doesn't understand things like "two-year-olds need X hours of sleep." The first thing she announced was that she wanted popcorn for breakfast. Then she announced that she wasn't planning to wear pants today. It's like she thinks I hatched out of a pod overnight, had no prior knowledge of ANYthing, and would just cheerfully say, "Popcorn it is! Do you want surry-up on it?" And really, pants are overrated. Who needs 'em?

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